thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
