I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
