she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
