he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Randomize
