We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
