I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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