Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
