you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Randomize
