Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
