your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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