how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
