is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
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