Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
