Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
