whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
