Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Soap is not a condiment
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Randomize
