Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
