I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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