Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
