Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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