you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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