Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
