I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
