It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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