We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
