did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize