what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
she told me i tasted like america
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
