We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
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