Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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