shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
