Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
