So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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