You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Randomize
