She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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