Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
