He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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