I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
barbara walters just said penis...
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
