my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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