ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
