Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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