Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Randomize
