We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
