I am in a vortex of obligation.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize
