i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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