Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
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