Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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