just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize
