He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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