Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Randomize
