proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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